I am having a REALLY hard time right now. Beside the excruciating pain I am experiencing from the endometriosis which is out of control because internal bleeding is being caused by my first period in five years, because we just took my IUD out 2 weeks ago. This proves that I have endometriosis and that we are doing the right thing with the hysterectomy, although we already knew that.
Anyway, on top of all of that, the pain is causing insomnia and the overmethylation depression and general malaise. I am exhausted, miserable, and in pain. Pain killers seem to help for a stint, but not for long. And I have physical signs of what I am going through. Thank GOD my boyfriend lives at a distance and does not read my blog, because this is just gross, but it's Lyme reality:
Don't judge. Just call me brave for posting that nasty piece of reality. I have tried to brush that away so many times you wouldn't believe it. But it is what it is and it comes and goes and when it appears I know my body cannot handle the speed at which my organs are trying to detox and my body collapses. And that is what is happening now on top of the endometriosis.
And so now I am crying. I don't understand how anyone can say that this disease doesn't exist. Spend 5 minutes in this body at any time in the past 29 years and enjoy any one of the symptoms that I may have had at that current time - pain, confusion, panic attacks, social phobias, migraines, loss of feeling in various parts of my body, exhaustion, hallucinations, depression, rage, stiff man syndrome, skin conditions, thyroid issues, white splotches on my skin, burning sensations on the bottoms of my feet, "growing pains" in my thighs, gastrointestinal issues, endometriosis, any number of hormone issues, Addison's Disease, connective tissue disorder, PCOS, degenerative disc disease, a friggin green ass tongue and the list goes on. DOESN'T EXIST? Excuse my choice of words but FUCK YOU.
The end.
yup it is mental how Doctors think we are pretending!! wth??? really...yeah I love my body...all because of a tick and how I didn't have the red ring ..many times... I so feel your pain I am glad of your Blog and your book and FB page. Just so yeah know you are never alone... for the longest time I thought I was...~~Lori
ReplyDeleteHoly crap Andrea! I am amazed at your resolve, your courage & your determination every time I read one of your posts. I think I would have give up years ago. Hang in there... You are amazing!
ReplyDeleteHow are you getting your probiotics?, I am so, oh, so sorry you are having surgery, your one of the strong ones, they just took my completely healthy gallbladder out, I'm like why didn't you biopsy and leave it in, thanks allot, my immune system took a big heave ho, for the last 1.5 months after the surgery. If like me you can't handle milk, I also went GF, hard being GF/DF except for my experimenting lately for better word - feeling like I'm starving and trying to put on weight. But, I got into water kefir only a week ago, and my digestion might, I say might be improving. Half cup kefir grains, half cup pure organic cane sugar, into two quart jar, wait two days, strain the kefir grains, start a new batch and drink. http://www.culturesforhealth.com/water-kefir-frequently-asked-questions-faq
ReplyDeleteSince sugar is also cut from my diet, the leftover 1.3 percent sugar in the kefir water is like heaven to me, I can stomach anything if it's good for me, you can literally find cultured grains already going from someone on craigslist, that's what I did and my grains are growing good. If they are slamming you with antibiotics, you need serious gut support, do what you can, maybe you already are, did a search on your site for diet and did not find much, but the lymes diet is well known I'm sure, and I'm more or less on it myself. Your mention of overmethylated, that's me, way to hypersensitive to people around me, and noise, fidgety, and high twitch. My naturopath said get on the GAPS and FODMAPS diet, I was literally starving myself, I now have a very accurate food journal and health log. I literally keep the cup,half, third, quarter out on the counter so I can kind of memorize what sizes they are to keep track of my portions in my health log, using google documents as well.